Time, time ticking on me

Ok, this being a mom thing, it's turned me into an obsessive clock-watcher. But it's almost more than simply watching the clock. Time is no longer my friend (although we never really were that tight to begin with). Sometimes I feel like everything in my day is about time. There is never enough of it, and it's always nipping at my heels.

6:00 am - Alarm goes off. I have 90 minutes to get myself and Sweets out the door. 20 of those are gone right off the top because I hit snooze twice. I seriously don't think I could face my day without my snooze habit. I cross my fingers every day that Sweets doesn't wake up before 6:30, because having a toddler clinging to my legs while I'm trying to get ready really slows me down. If we hit 6:45 and he's not up yet, I call it a good day.

8:00 am - Arrive at school. Make a list of things I want to accomplish that day, meetings, presentations, phone conferences, etc. By 8:45 am the list is crap and I may as well throw it away because there's a good chance 2 crises have already walked into my office that are going to take me until lunchtime to sort out.

And speaking of lunchtime, by the time noon rolls around, I'm wondering how Sweet's morning at the sitter's was, and whether he's going to take a decent nap (answer: probably not). I try to carve out 20 minutes to cram down a sandwich and balance my checkbook or make a grocery list because I know I won't have the time or energy to do it in the evening.

3:00 pm - Students are dismissed, but my day is not over. This part of the day is so difficult for me because I am itching to get home to Sweetie Pea, but I often have a parent meeting, a committee meeting, or a tutoring program to oversee. I feel a constant, obsessive need to know what time it is, and totally torn between being a working mama and just a mama.

5:00 pm - til I fall into bed: It's go time, people. Pick up Sweets, and simultaneously make dinner, entertain him, unpack his bag, toss in some laundry and do a general pick-up of the house. Feed him dinner, eat some dinner, clean up some dinner - what time is it? Shoot! Time for bath. Bath, books, bed by 7:30. Survey the landscape: so much more to do. Pick up toys. Pack Sweets' daycare bag and lunch for the following day. Grab a shower (saves precious time in the a.m.). Fold laundry. Pick out outfit for tomorrow (saves even more time in the morning). Pack my own lunch. I'm so tired, what time is it? 9:30. Finish whatever I'm doing and go to bed. Read 4 sentances of whatever book I'm reading and pass out. Lather, rinse, repeat. Time, you are evil.