Saturday, July 9, 2011

The one where I post about poop

Consider yourself warned: this post is gross. Well, it's not that gross to me (or many other baby mamas, I suspect) because I spend more time than the average person does cleaning up or discussing my child's bodily functions. But if you're not into that kind of thing, may I suggest heading over to Facebook and finding something less disgusting to read.

So Sweets sometimes has the occasional bout of constipation, as many babies do. He's been struggling with it over the last few days, so this morning, I fixed him my fail-proof home remedy for breakfast: whole wheat toast spread with pureed prunes. Works every time. He gobbled it up, along with some diluted juice. Not long after that, we changed 4 poopy diapers, all before lunch. Problem solved, right? Wrong. So wrong.

After his nap, I decided to take him swimming while Hubs mowed the lawn. As I was packing our pool bag, some inner voice told me to throw a few extra diapers and a pack of wipes in. So away we went, and we had a lovely time until Sweets started getting cranky and I wasn't sure why. We got out of the pool and sat under an umbrella for awhile, drying off and people-watching. Then he really started getting crabby. Thinking perhaps he was hungry and tired, I changed him into a clean, dry outfit and nursed him lying down on our towels with an Aaden and Anais blanket over us (BEST blankets ever, btw). He dozed a little, but all of a sudden woke up screaming - so weird! Time to leave. I buckled him into the stroller, tossed all our stuff in the bag and hi-tailed it for the parking lot. I put all of our things into the car and was just reaching for Sweets when I noticed he was making his poop face and gripping the snack tray on his stroller. Then I heard a very suspicious rumbling. Oh man, again? So I spread a towel in the back of my SUV and prepared to change him. It wasn't until I laid him down that I realized he was His fresh clean outfit was now wet with poop. Closer inspection revealed that he had poop up his back, all over his belly and his legs, and oozing out of every crevice in his diaper. Inner voice, I would just like to take this opportunity to thank you for encouraging me to pack those extra changing supplies because without them, I would have been up a poop creek without a paddle. Around our house, we rate stinky diapers based on how many wipes it took to clean up after them (i.e. "Whoa, that was a 5 wipe dipe!"). This was like a 37 wipe dipe. And taking off the poop-soaked romper he was wearing meant I got poop on his head. Ew. On top of which, I did not have another outfit besides his wet bathing suit. So he rode home in his carseat wearing nothing but a diaper. And I rode home thinking I would never again feed him prunes, juice, and peaches all in one day.


  1. I post about poop all the time. :) It's amazing how interesting it is now that I am a mom.

    Following! Here from Toddle Along Tuesday!

    I'd love a follow back

  2. Oh no! I had a similar incident- at a funeral! We were in the procession and I could tell something was amiss. We stopped when we arrived at the cemetery and I knew it was now or never. Got her out of the carseat to change her on the front seat of my VW Beetle to find a poo-splosion. The procession started to move while I scrambled to stem the tide, and eventually left without us. The next procession for another funeral showed up and asked me to move- at which point I shouted, "Dealing with a dirty diaper over here!" and they drove around me.

    Once it was under control, I had to drive around the cemetery looking for my family. Thankfully I found them just in time for the burial.

  3. Ok, that is SO much worse of a situation than my swimming pool story! I am so sorry that happened to you! Is it even a little bit funny looking back on it?